Sympto Thermal

A long time ago, I looked into natural birth control for a question on my advice blog. I found the statistics impressive. Far better than the traditional calendar (rhythm) method. Interest piqued, I read a book on the subject, Taking Charge of Your Fertility. I was fascinated to find that even a well-informed and self-actualized 28-year-old mom still has a lot to learn about the workings of the female body.

After Elsie was born, I kept missing my pill time. Eventually, I gave up, deciding that it wasn't worth taking a progesterone-only pill if I was going to take it badly. (Progesterone-only bc is much more susceptible to variations in timing than combination hormone bc.) For a great many months, I was effectively celibate anyway. Low estrogen levels are no good for libido or sexual pleasure.

As soon as I got my period and sex-drive back, I started charting. Here's how it's supposed to work:

The Egg:
When a woman ovulates, that egg is viable for less than 24 hours. You want to avoid having sex for at least 48 hours after your first egg is released, just in case there is a second egg.

The sperm:
Most of my sources say that sperm lives for 3 days inside a hospitable vagina. Some sources say up to 5 days. Your goal, if using fertility awareness method (FAM) is to avoid harboring viable sperm when you ovulate.

Temperature:
You take your basal body temperature every morning when you wake up, before you move around, and mark it on a chart. Once you've ovulated, your hormones shift and your body temperature rises a few tenths of a degree. When you see this plateau in your basal temp, you know your egg is laid. You're infertile after this, through the first 5 days of your period. Your fertility is then low until you start showing symptoms of your next round of fertility, like...

Cervical position:
When you're nowhere near ovulation, your cervix is low in your vagina and hard and closed. Go on, reach up there and feel around for it! As your body prepares for ovulation, the cervix gets higher, softer, and literally opens to allow sperm to pass through.

Cervical Fluid:
Also known by that much yuckier sounding title, "discharge." Your body lays out the welcome mat (or pile of welcome goo) for all those little swimmers. Usually, the vagina is quite hostile to sperm. As ovulation approaches, this all changes. The cervix produces lots of slippery, stretchy, egg-white-like fluid that is very easy for sperm to live in and swim through. You can test it with your finger, feeling either at the vaginal opening or up at the cervix. There's a progression from dry (infertile) to sticky or crumbly (probably not fertile) to lotiony (maybe fertile) to slippery and stretchy (very fertile). Fertile CF is not water soluble, so you might even see it in the toilet after you pee.


My Experience:

All this is wonderful in theory. Chart your temps! Feel your cervix! Squish your juices! Write it down. Presto! A pattern will emerge! In practice, it was not at all so simple for me.

If your basal temperature is sensitive to changes, there are many things you can do to risk out of temperature reliability. For instance:

• Going to bed late
  
• Waking up late
  
• Waking up early
• Waking up at night to go to the bathroom (disturbance)
• Not sleeping well for any reason
  
• Drinking alcohol (even one drink)
• Having a cold
• Having a fever
  

I appear to be very susceptible to all these factors. Some months, the ovulation jump was clear as day, but most months took a bit of creative interpretation. I'm a grad student: I lie awake worrying about my stupid thesis all the time. I'm a mom: I get up when Elsie gets up, and some mornings that's 6:00, but if it's 7:00, you'd better believe I'm sleeping until she wakes me. My temps were all over the place.

Then there's my cervix. I think my fingers are too short. And my cervix moves around. And the opening? How open is open? My cervix was all over the place, and often beyond the reach of my stubby little fingers. So much for that sign.

Cervical fluid should be the most obvious sign of impending fertility. Not for me! Where is it? I don't have much, so I have to reach all the way up to that evasive cervix to get it. Some months, from the end of my period through the entire month was the same every day. I never got anything that stretched in the least, except for a stray gob here and there.

It's little wonder that we got pregnant accidentally back in October using this method. Quickly, too. Much sooner than we got pregnant actively trying for Elsie.

"You're not very good at this, are you?" Was all Hub had to say, chuckling at me. And he's right. I am not very good at it at all!

I did learn a lot, though. Best of all, I've got a much better handle on how to get pregnant on purpose. I doubt I'll ever have to try for months and months and months again. I know I'm ovulating, which is reassuring after my miscarriage and D&C.

I do NOT recommend FAM as birth control for anyone

• Is not in a monogamous relationship
• Has poor self-control
  
• CAN NOT get pregnant right now
• Has an irregular night and/or morning schedule
• Drinks alcohol more than once a week
  

I would recommend FAM for anyone who

• Is trying to get pregnant or has gone off the pill and will try soon
  
• Is using a non-hormonal bc (like condoms or abstinence) and just wants to learn more about her cycle
• Is trying to space children but doesn't really mind so much if there's a surprise
  
• Has super obvious and easy-to-read symptoms
  
• Has the support of a professional FAM coach to double check everything
  
• Has no other birth control options (Probably doesn't apply to you if you're sitting at a computer and reading this blog!)

Oh, and you'd better count on those sperm living for 5 days. 6, even. That's the only way my chart from last October makes sense. Hub must have super-sperm!