Gratitude

This is just a quick blog to say thank you to everyone who has been sending thoughts and prayers and words and gifts from every corner of my life and every corner of the globe.

The last couple of weeks have presented me with loss and challenge unlike those I've ever faced before.  That is certain.  But I want you all to know that I'm doing okay.  Of course I am sad a lot, and that came through strongly when I wrote about one of my hardest days with the breastfeeding.  Grief comes in waves, but the waves have been getting smaller and shorter-lived as the days go on.

There are so many emotions I have been feeling lately, and some of the strongest ones are positive.  I feel loved by my friends and family, and even by strangers.  I feel strongly supported by my family and circles.  I feel closely connected to Hub right now.  I feel joy when I look at my very real, very live, very healthy daughter Elsie.  I feel relief.  The deep, deep relief of a mother who knows her baby, who might have suffered terribly, is at peace. 

I waited for days to wake up and feel that life was just too hard to get out of bed.  It never happened.  Maybe it still will, but it seems less and less likely as the days go by.

Thank you for your love and support here.  I just want everyone who reads here to hear it from me: I'm not saying that this grieving is closed, that it is over, but I think I am going to be okay.